Yes, I am excited!

Last night as I was checking out at Walgreens, the cashier sat and stared at me for a couple of seconds and then said (in a very judgmental and not very nice way), "and how old is your baby?" (I was holding Hailey in my arms.) I told her that she was a year old (I should have told her that she was 15 months). She then said, "well....they are going to be pretty close together, don't you think??" At this point, I was fighting back every urge in my body to not just leave my groceries and walk out of the store. But, I took a deep breath and remembered the advice that my friend told me the other day. I then put a smile on my face and said, "Yes they will, and I am very excited." She looked at me very confused and said, "You're excited?" I then reassured her that I was and decided to totally shock her by telling her that in less than 2 months I will have 4 little girls running around and how much fun it will be. She softened up a little and I guess decided that if I was excited about it then it was okay.

I cannot even tell you the kind of looks that I get from people as I walk in somewhere with three girls, one who is very much still a baby (and is small for her age anyways), and a very obvious pregnant belly. It is not like I live in Utah where big families are the norm, I live in a part of the country where a family with three kids is considered a big family. I am really glad that I cannot hear what people are thinking, but sometimes it is as if I can just by the expression on their face. Does it bother me? Somedays. Somedays I look at myself in the mirror with the same expression. But most of the time, I just feel grateful and happy. Years from now when the crazy stage of two little ones close together finally settle down and I have four beautiful girls who will mean everything to me and who will give me beautiful grandchildren, it will all be worth it.

It is all worth it and yes, Mrs. Cashier at Walgreens, I really am excited (and nervous and scared out of my mind) :)