Thursday, July 02, 2009

What I wish I'd said.

Last night we had a suprise visit by a 19 year old young man who we knew from Fayetteville. Cory was his YM leader at church. He comes from a wonderful family (I totally love his mom) and he is a really good boy. He was stopping by for the night on his way to California. As Cory and I sat and talked with him for awhile, I couldn't help but feel excitement and nervousness for this boy. He is like most of us were at 19; yearning for independance, trying to figure out what comes next, learning who we are without our parents, and thinking that we've got life pretty much figured out. At least that is how I was at 19. I was in college thinking that I was pretty darn smart, I was completely smitten by Cory and ready to begin my perfect fairy tale life with him, and I was so excited and ready to show my parents how independant I had become.

As I listened to this boy, I could relate in so many ways to where I was at his age, and yet there were so many things that I just wanted to tell him. I wanted to tell him that my parents really did try there very best, and I only pray that I can be the same kind of parent to my teenage daughters. I wanted to tell him that independance is not really what it is cracked up to be, life is hard and it hardly ever goes the way you think it will. I wanted to explain to him that as smart as he thinks he is now, just wait...he'll realize how little he really knows when real life gets a hold of him. I'd tell him to prepare himself for marriage because it is not a perfect fairy tale, it is hard work. I'd tell him to study diligently, pray feverently, work hard, and be grateful because you never know what tomorrow will bring.

I hope life will be good to him, but most likely it will be filled with moments of refinement, trials of intensity, and seasons of disappointment and sorrow. But hopefully, all these things will work together for his good and become course corrections in his life. I hope that he'll find his way back to that narrow road where faith will become his anchor, hope his guiding star, and eternal happiness his destiny.


Mandy said...

I remember feeling that way when I worked with the Young Women....if only you could say it all and get through to them - spare them some unnecessary heartache and better prepare them for some of the necessary pain, too. I'm sure that just being in your home and talking to you and Cory has uplifted him.

Tricia said...

I too, wish I could say all those things. It's such a challenge when pride takes over any ability to listen to those who know them best. I have much more respect for the lessons my dad tried to teach me (despite the method) now that I have been a parent. I am SO grateful for youth leaders who care...truely care for and love the youth they serve. This makes such a HUGE impact on one's life. Thanks to all of you who are able love them in spite of and with the prickly nature of youth. And a special thanks to you and Cory, Melissa.

Sherrie said...

You are right, I LOVE your background! As I was at the temple today I thought of my beautiful little Clairisa and time stood still for a moment.

I think that your time with the young man mentioned will stay with him for a long while. After all, look how long it has been since you have seen him and yet he choose to stop by on his way 'out of town'

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