First Day of School

Sister Love

Daddy's Girls

Young Women Book of Mormon Bootcamp

The Big 1-0

I can't believe Katelund is ten now!!! We had a watermelon themed swimming party. It was such a fun party.

It's so hard to believe that I've been a mom for a whole decade. It seems like just yesterday that I was in Minnesota anxiously awaiting the birth of my first baby girl.

Irony

So you know how I just wrote this whole post about my precious children and how much I love shopping with them and seeing their sweet faces? Well today, not so much. I made the horrible mistake of taking all four kids school shopping. The last store on my agenda was Target. I decided that since they were all getting tired of shopping, that I would bribe them with drinks and a bag of popcorn to split while we shopped for the remaining school uniform pants and shorts....bad idea. I'm pretty sure there is a trail of popcorn everywhere we were at that store. Also, at one point, Hailey dumped the entire bag of popcorn onto the floor. What did I do? What any desperate horribly disgusting mother would do...pick it all up, put it in the bag, and continue to let my children shove it into their mouths. I can't believe I did that?! Did I mention how desperate I was to finish without a complete melt down from one or more children?! Well, it didn't work. The melt downs came, the begging for this and that was relentless, and children climbing in and out of carts, hitting, screaming, and gnashing of teeth (a little Book of Mormon humor there) was coming at me from all four of my monsters. Then to top it all off, as I was walking down one of the aisles, I caught a reflection of myself in one of the mirrors. Holy cow! My hair was a mess and my figure was the least flattering thing I've ever seen! Pregnancy #6 does not look good on me. So, there are not going to be any belly pics. In fact, all those people who post their weekly pregnancy pics of their tiny little bumps, are no longer my friends. J/K...kindof. As I walked out of the store, I was fighting back tears from Katelund pushing the cart over my foot and wanting to knock out all of them and scream at the top of my lungs. I got in my van, buckled them all in, turned on Primary music as loud as I could (trying to keep the horrible thoughts and words out of my mind)and bawled my eyes out as I drove home. All four of my children were begging for forgiveness the entire way home. Apparently, silence and tears work way better than scream and lecturing. But don't worry, the lecture came as soon as we got home and I had gained control of myself. It was seriously the worst shopping trip of my life. I'm so glad it's over and I don't think I'm going anywhere with all four of them for the rest of my life. The end.

Growing Up

The other week while I was in the store, Hailey and Makayla were "helping" me grocery shop while I sent Katelund and Cloey to the next aisle to pick up a few more items on my grocery list. There was a middle aged man who was observing all this as he picked out his produce. He let out a little chuckle and said, "Man, I bet you can't wait for them to all grow up." I looked at him and responded back in a way that I'm sure he wasn't expecting. I said, "Are you kidding me? No way! I love them little!" Over the years I have heard so many different kinds of comments from people, especially as the number of children I have keeps increasing. I had one lady at the thrift store awhile back who past me in the aisle as I was trying to talk reason into my two and three year old who were done shopping and ready for naps. She said, "Oh, I feel SO sorry for you." I said, "Well, don't. This is just a hard moment. I love having children." I used to just smile and walk away thinking "how dare they say that!" or "who do they think they are!" But, the older I get the bolder I am getting. I want people to know that yes, I may appear completely crazy with my pregnant belly and four children in tow behind me, but I did it on purpose. I want children. I love having children. And, the hard frustrating moments that sometimes take me to insanity, are totally worth the moments of complete and utter joy that come from raising children. They are the hope and ray of sunshine in an ever darkening and despairing world. They are the reason I am trying each day to be better and become my best self. They are the ones who teach me how to love, share, and forgive. They are the ones that teach me to find joy in the simple and gratitude in the unnoticeable. In their eyes I see who I can become. In their eyes, I can see into heaven. No, of course I don't want them to grow up. I don't want them to lose their innocence or child-like faith. But, I know that at some point they will. It is already starting to happen. Just last week I had to teach my eight and ten year old about sex because of a conversation that a friend had with them. It broke my heart. But then again, I am so glad they knew to come to me. Life passes so quickly and I know that some day I am going to miss having little ones running around me and leaving their messes and handprints on everything. So in the meantime, go ahead, tell me what you think about my children as I pass you in the stores. But be prepared, because I'm going to share with you how I feel as well.