5 1/2 more weeks

In many ways this pregnancy seems to have flown by, and then in other ways it has been the longest pregnancy of my life. You may think that because it is my last pregnancy, I would enjoy every part of it. Nope. Not even close. Of course I know that things could always be worse. I could have lost my baby. I could have been bleeding, in the hospital, etc. But, I haven't been. Other than two small scares (which turned out to be nothing), I have had a really good pregnancy. But, that being said, I am so over being pregnant. I have been pregnant on and off over the last decade of my life. It has been wonderful, horrible, miserable, exciting, discouraging, heart-breaking, emotional, joyful, and absolutely miraculous. It has truly been the best of times and the worst of times. But as I come up on my 33rd birthday, 11 years since my very first pregnancy, I feel so grateful to put all those experiences and emotions into a special place in my heart. I am ready to move onto the next phase of my life. The phase where I am raising, teaching, nurturing, and loving the children that I bore. AND, I am so excited to do this without the hormones of pregnancy. Being a pregnant mother to four children has not been easy. I have been so irritable this pregnancy and my emotions have been all over the place. I have never felt so tired and depleted of energy as I have this time. Really, all my symptoms have been worse this time...the heartburn, insomnia, restless leg syndrome, syatic nerve pain, headaches, congestion, ligaments, old scar tissue burning from past C-section scars, the nausea, the dizziness....Okay, I'll just stop there. So to say that I'm ready for it to be over is quite an understatement. I used to wonder how I could ever say I was done. How could I go on knowing that I would never feel a baby inside me for the rest of my mortal life? How could I never experience the incredible joy that comes from holding my brand new baby in my arms? Although I'm sure I will have moments of missing that, I have felt such peace in my decision to be done. I may not have enjoyed the last nine months the way that I should've, but I know that I will definitely cherish and savor each moment of having a baby in my arms and in our home. It is like having a piece of heaven on earth. So I guess for the last 5 1/2 weeks, I need to just remember that soon all these uncomfortable feelings and pains will be but a mere memory. A time in my life when I gave and sacrificed in a way that only a mother could truly understand. These pregnancies have changed me. They have molded my heart and taught me sacrifice and love in a whole new way and to a completely different level. How thankful I am to be a mother, to be able to be a partner with God in bringing his precious children to earth. It has been hard, but I wouldn't change my experiences for anything in the whole world.